1 00:00:00,560 --> 00:00:04,680 Want to find out when the newest movies will be coming to a video store near 2 00:00:04,680 --> 00:00:08,119 you? Visit VideoETA .com. 3 00:00:08,360 --> 00:00:09,920 We know video. 4 00:00:19,660 --> 00:00:22,360 So this is it, the infamous erotic bed. 5 00:00:22,600 --> 00:00:23,600 This is it. 6 00:00:23,840 --> 00:00:26,680 This is where they all get the heebie -jeebies from the erotic witch. You 7 00:00:26,680 --> 00:00:29,200 feeling the heebie -jeebies in you from the erotic witch, honey? 8 00:00:29,480 --> 00:00:31,060 I don't need a witch for that. 9 00:00:31,440 --> 00:00:32,439 Oh, really? 10 00:00:32,640 --> 00:00:33,800 Mm -hmm. What do you need? 11 00:00:35,000 --> 00:00:36,540 I don't know. Let's have a picnic. 12 00:00:37,100 --> 00:00:39,180 A picnic, huh? Mm -hmm. Yeah? 13 00:00:39,560 --> 00:00:40,560 Feeling hungry? 14 00:00:40,760 --> 00:00:42,380 I'm feeling very hungry. 15 00:00:43,340 --> 00:00:44,900 Good. We're going to work up an appetite. 16 00:00:45,320 --> 00:00:47,140 Did you bring good food for our picnic? 17 00:00:49,440 --> 00:00:51,040 Um, I think you're going to like it. 18 00:00:51,700 --> 00:00:52,700 Really? 19 00:00:56,200 --> 00:00:57,260 Come here, lover boy. 20 00:00:58,260 --> 00:00:59,260 I'm right here. 21 00:01:03,240 --> 00:01:04,379 How you feeling? 22 00:01:05,360 --> 00:01:08,740 Oh, that kind of picnic. 23 00:01:09,000 --> 00:01:10,000 Uh -huh. 24 00:01:12,320 --> 00:01:14,280 I like these kinds of picnics. 25 00:01:14,540 --> 00:01:15,158 Oh, really? 26 00:01:15,160 --> 00:01:16,160 Oh, hors d 'oeuvres. 27 00:01:16,800 --> 00:01:19,920 There you go. 28 00:01:21,720 --> 00:01:22,780 Like that, huh? 29 00:01:23,260 --> 00:01:24,260 Yeah. 30 00:01:34,190 --> 00:01:35,330 Can you dance a little for me? 31 00:01:36,870 --> 00:01:39,610 Just to get us worked up in our appetite. 32 00:01:39,970 --> 00:01:40,969 There you go. 33 00:01:40,970 --> 00:01:42,190 Is that good enough for you, baby? 34 00:01:42,910 --> 00:01:43,990 Can you turn around? 35 00:01:45,990 --> 00:01:47,010 Well, that's great. 36 00:01:47,590 --> 00:01:48,650 You like that, huh? 37 00:01:48,910 --> 00:01:49,768 Uh -huh. 38 00:01:49,770 --> 00:01:51,050 Just don't pull my chain. 39 00:01:53,450 --> 00:01:55,790 Well, uh... Come here. 40 00:01:56,210 --> 00:01:57,210 Okay. 41 00:02:17,500 --> 00:02:18,500 Oh, yeah. 42 00:02:22,060 --> 00:02:24,160 Oh, baby. 43 00:02:26,420 --> 00:02:27,440 Oh, my God. 44 00:02:27,820 --> 00:02:28,820 Oh, so much. 45 00:02:29,720 --> 00:02:30,940 Hold on to me. 46 00:02:31,360 --> 00:02:32,420 Hold on to me. 47 00:02:35,340 --> 00:02:36,340 Hold on. 48 00:02:36,980 --> 00:02:37,980 It's just a leaf. 49 00:02:38,020 --> 00:02:39,420 It's just a leaf on your face. It's okay. 50 00:02:40,220 --> 00:02:41,380 Hold on. 51 00:02:42,120 --> 00:02:43,280 What? What? 52 00:02:43,740 --> 00:02:44,740 What? 53 00:02:45,620 --> 00:02:46,620 Honey. 54 00:02:47,300 --> 00:02:48,840 What is that? 55 00:03:11,880 --> 00:03:14,440 Hey, hey, hey, hey. Hey, there he is. There he is. 56 00:03:16,460 --> 00:03:20,220 Sheriff, Sheriff, is it true the human remains of a journal dated 1812 were 57 00:03:20,220 --> 00:03:21,220 recently found in the woods? 58 00:03:21,680 --> 00:03:27,020 We discovered an extremely ancient corpse and a journal of some kind. The 59 00:03:27,020 --> 00:03:29,920 discovery was made by a couple of college lovebirds. 60 00:03:30,120 --> 00:03:34,580 They found a body. Now, we don't know how old the body is, so we're having a 61 00:03:34,580 --> 00:03:38,980 forensics team studying some dental records, and we got some officials from 62 00:03:38,980 --> 00:03:40,020 Bacchusville Museum. 63 00:03:40,520 --> 00:03:41,920 carbon dating the journal. 64 00:03:42,500 --> 00:03:46,300 Is it true, Sheriff, that the journal proves without a doubt the existence of 65 00:03:46,300 --> 00:03:48,320 Helena Pottsworth, the legendary erotic witch? 66 00:03:48,840 --> 00:03:52,100 God damn it to hell, Tolliver. You listen to me right now, okay? 67 00:03:52,320 --> 00:03:57,340 You print so much as a molecule of what you just said in that asswipe you call a 68 00:03:57,340 --> 00:04:02,400 newspaper of yours, and I will personally string you up by your ankles, 69 00:04:02,400 --> 00:04:06,700 you from your Adam's apple down to your doodle, and bugger your screen. 70 00:04:07,120 --> 00:04:09,640 You understand what I'm saying? I just got finished. 71 00:04:10,060 --> 00:04:13,960 getting rid of all the perverts from Bacchusville. And I'll be damned if I'm 72 00:04:13,960 --> 00:04:18,560 going to see Bacchusville's woods being turned into a masturbation haven again. 73 00:04:18,720 --> 00:04:19,720 You got me? 74 00:04:20,360 --> 00:04:21,360 Yes, Sheriff. 75 00:04:22,660 --> 00:04:23,660 Interview over. 76 00:04:25,400 --> 00:04:29,380 But Sheriff, Sheriff, isn't it true that... Sheriff, isn't it true that you 77 00:04:29,380 --> 00:04:32,180 were... Sheriff, please, Sheriff. Bite my shorts. Sheriff, please, Sheriff. 78 00:04:32,640 --> 00:04:34,300 Smoke my underpants. 79 00:04:35,120 --> 00:04:36,520 I'll kick you in the ankle. 80 00:04:36,760 --> 00:04:38,220 I'll bite you in the ass. 81 00:04:58,120 --> 00:04:59,620 How's the examination coming? 82 00:05:00,480 --> 00:05:02,320 Detective Manz, you startled me. 83 00:05:02,880 --> 00:05:03,880 I'm sorry. 84 00:05:04,380 --> 00:05:07,000 Listen, did you get any verification on the dates yet? 85 00:05:07,300 --> 00:05:09,880 No, I haven't even managed to get the damn thing open. 86 00:05:10,200 --> 00:05:11,520 Oh, damn it. 87 00:05:12,140 --> 00:05:15,760 You know, the mayor is just breathing down my neck on this whole thing. He 88 00:05:15,760 --> 00:05:19,400 wants to put the myth of the erotic witch to bed once and for all, you know. 89 00:05:20,460 --> 00:05:21,840 So I'll check in with you tomorrow. 90 00:05:23,520 --> 00:05:24,600 In the meantime... 91 00:05:26,380 --> 00:05:28,220 Why don't you try some lube on this thing? 92 00:05:29,320 --> 00:05:33,880 That's what I use when I find myself in a tight situation. 93 00:05:48,900 --> 00:05:52,500 August 10th, 1812, the year of our Lord. 94 00:05:53,080 --> 00:05:57,320 And the day Helena Pottsworth brought the erotic fever to the naive town of 95 00:05:57,320 --> 00:06:02,000 Bacchusville like a plague of locusts. My hand trembles as if an unholy seizure 96 00:06:02,000 --> 00:06:02,959 were upon it. 97 00:06:02,960 --> 00:06:05,700 It's all I can do to resist the urge to fondle myself. 98 00:06:06,300 --> 00:06:08,040 But the tale must be told. 99 00:06:09,640 --> 00:06:10,660 Oh, my God. 100 00:09:11,840 --> 00:09:16,860 I stand before you here today as your newly elected mayor, and I'm going to 101 00:09:16,860 --> 00:09:20,820 you know right now that I'm going to start implementing some of the plans 102 00:09:20,820 --> 00:09:22,280 got me elected mayor in the first place. 103 00:09:27,720 --> 00:09:32,920 Any citizen found on a horse that is over the legal limit of corn squeezing 104 00:09:32,920 --> 00:09:35,880 shall have their horse taken from them by the city. 105 00:09:43,690 --> 00:09:45,630 clog our city streets no more. 106 00:09:48,690 --> 00:09:52,950 Miss Parker and her filthy horsehouse shall not be allowed to do businesses in 107 00:09:52,950 --> 00:09:53,970 this town any longer. 108 00:10:00,790 --> 00:10:05,130 And God damn it, Pierre, you are not marching with us in the same package 109 00:10:05,130 --> 00:10:06,130 pray. 110 00:10:11,630 --> 00:10:14,890 I shall make Pocketsville a shining example of the American way. 111 00:10:15,250 --> 00:10:19,430 I shall make Pocketsville a city you can be proud to raise your children in. And 112 00:10:19,430 --> 00:10:21,570 if anybody doesn't agree with me, I shall have them killed. 113 00:10:30,890 --> 00:10:35,810 Oh, I mean, I'd be happy to discuss any of my policies with any citizen at any 114 00:10:35,810 --> 00:10:37,490 time. Now, are there any questions? 115 00:10:38,090 --> 00:10:39,090 No? 116 00:10:41,600 --> 00:10:45,100 Good. Well, I shall see everybody this Sunday in church at Pocketsville Church. 117 00:10:45,180 --> 00:10:48,600 And remember, while going to church is not mandatory, if I do not see you there 118 00:10:48,600 --> 00:10:50,120 in church, I shall have you killed. 119 00:10:55,000 --> 00:10:57,840 Oh, I mean, don't forget to bring extra pennies for the big sale after the 120 00:10:57,840 --> 00:10:59,120 sermon. This first. 121 00:11:02,620 --> 00:11:03,620 My dear. 122 00:11:03,800 --> 00:11:04,759 Oh, Rudy. 123 00:11:04,760 --> 00:11:06,380 It's such a beautiful day. 124 00:11:07,140 --> 00:11:08,140 Yes, it is. 125 00:11:08,300 --> 00:11:10,100 Why don't we go for a walk in the woods? 126 00:11:10,480 --> 00:11:13,500 No, my dear, I'm far too busy for that. We're going to head over to the 127 00:11:13,500 --> 00:11:16,120 elementary school for a good old -fashioned book burning. We're going to 128 00:11:16,120 --> 00:11:18,460 every book with objectional material in it. 129 00:11:19,720 --> 00:11:21,360 Well, what if you don't find any? 130 00:11:21,600 --> 00:11:22,600 Well, then we'll have some. 131 00:11:23,020 --> 00:11:25,740 Then we'll burn the book, then we'll hang the librarian. See, it's a win -win 132 00:11:25,740 --> 00:11:26,760 situation all the way around. 133 00:11:27,280 --> 00:11:28,280 It's great to be dead. 134 00:11:28,640 --> 00:11:29,640 Oh, 135 00:11:29,920 --> 00:11:32,980 I mean, what a pleasure it is doing my duty for a school. 136 00:11:33,260 --> 00:11:35,700 Pardon me, dear, we have lots of books to burn. Come with me, John. 137 00:15:17,070 --> 00:15:18,070 Bye. 138 00:17:19,109 --> 00:17:20,109 Oh, you're my life. 139 00:17:21,290 --> 00:17:23,869 Oh, no, you just need to know how to communicate with animals. 140 00:17:25,089 --> 00:17:26,650 Are you okay? 141 00:17:27,109 --> 00:17:28,109 Yeah. 142 00:17:28,390 --> 00:17:32,070 I've never seen you before. Who are you? I am Helena Pottsworth. 143 00:17:32,450 --> 00:17:33,870 Helena Pottsworth? 144 00:17:34,290 --> 00:17:38,170 The only Helena Pottsworth I've ever heard of is the old spinster that 145 00:17:38,170 --> 00:17:39,470 schoolchildren whisper about. 146 00:17:39,730 --> 00:17:40,910 Oh, you think of my mother. 147 00:17:41,310 --> 00:17:44,870 She was mysterious and secretive, just like I am. 148 00:17:46,970 --> 00:17:48,670 Oh, um... No. 149 00:17:49,080 --> 00:17:53,980 I was just sunbathing. I was here watching you long before the gorilla 150 00:17:55,120 --> 00:17:56,120 Oh. 151 00:17:56,600 --> 00:17:58,280 You must think I'm filthy. No. 152 00:17:58,800 --> 00:18:03,020 No, I come from a long line of healers and thinkers. We delve in the realm of 153 00:18:03,020 --> 00:18:04,020 sexuality. 154 00:18:05,000 --> 00:18:06,000 Sexuality? Yes. 155 00:18:06,180 --> 00:18:07,480 He ignores you, doesn't he? 156 00:18:08,400 --> 00:18:11,300 Yes. Let me show you the pleasures he will not. 157 00:21:25,350 --> 00:21:29,030 That was... that was... Liberating? 158 00:21:29,590 --> 00:21:30,590 Oh, yes. 159 00:21:31,450 --> 00:21:36,070 I want you to come to Bacchusville with me. The town thinks you're an old crone. 160 00:21:36,230 --> 00:21:39,130 You saved my life. You deserve a hero's welcome. 161 00:21:39,450 --> 00:21:41,770 No, people like me need to stay in solitude. 162 00:21:42,350 --> 00:21:45,170 Oh, don't be silly. The townspeople will love you. 163 00:21:45,590 --> 00:21:49,290 But we should probably keep what happened here today to ourselves. 164 00:21:49,670 --> 00:21:50,670 Why? 165 00:21:51,010 --> 00:21:53,510 Oh, my husband, the mayor. 166 00:21:54,540 --> 00:21:56,940 The townspeople, they wouldn't understand. 167 00:21:57,880 --> 00:22:01,520 They'd think it evil and profane. Do you think what we did was evil and profane? 168 00:22:02,200 --> 00:22:03,520 No, never. 169 00:22:16,440 --> 00:22:18,940 Ban! If my theory is correct... 170 00:22:19,699 --> 00:22:25,140 driving a rusty railway spike up the left nostril will cure insomnia. 171 00:22:26,860 --> 00:22:27,860 Gee, Dr. 172 00:22:28,020 --> 00:22:31,700 Pete, you're a frickin' genius. Now, if only you could create a drug that would 173 00:22:31,700 --> 00:22:35,440 turn the entire community into mindless zombies, that would be great. 174 00:22:36,820 --> 00:22:40,260 Oh, I mean, if only you could create a drug that would alleviate humans, but no 175 00:22:40,260 --> 00:22:43,740 bullshit, I want mindless zombies. You think you could do that? Yeah, well, 176 00:22:43,740 --> 00:22:45,740 enough to do it. Start some funs your way? Oh, yes. 177 00:23:14,730 --> 00:23:15,730 Come there, Rudolph. 178 00:23:15,830 --> 00:23:17,150 I am Helena Pottsworth. 179 00:23:18,050 --> 00:23:19,110 Helena Pottsworth. 180 00:23:19,330 --> 00:23:20,470 Oh, Jesus Christ. 181 00:23:20,690 --> 00:23:23,610 It's a pleasure to meet you. I wish I could see you, but it's a pleasure to 182 00:23:23,610 --> 00:23:27,530 you. You saved my wife's life, and for that I'm forever in your debt. That is 183 00:23:27,530 --> 00:23:28,530 all I'm talking about. 184 00:23:32,950 --> 00:23:36,310 So, why don't you tell us and the community something about yourself? 185 00:23:36,650 --> 00:23:40,790 Well, I come from a long line of herbalists and healers. 186 00:23:41,310 --> 00:23:44,810 Helena knows all there is to know about this. human body. 187 00:23:45,030 --> 00:23:50,930 Really? Well, as town physicians and chemists, I'd love to discuss theories 188 00:23:50,930 --> 00:23:51,829 you sometime. 189 00:23:51,830 --> 00:23:53,950 Well, I'm sure we can arrange that. Oh, good. 190 00:23:55,310 --> 00:23:59,830 I want each and every one of you to know I plan on putting my hands on all of 191 00:23:59,830 --> 00:24:04,510 you. I know the ancient secrets of health and happiness and will enlighten 192 00:24:04,510 --> 00:24:05,510 all. 193 00:24:18,670 --> 00:24:21,430 with something so trivial. I hate that smelly old bastard. 194 00:24:21,810 --> 00:24:23,330 I mean, he's really coming. 195 00:24:23,890 --> 00:24:25,670 What are you blabbering on about, boy? 196 00:24:32,070 --> 00:24:32,989 Oh, no. 197 00:24:32,990 --> 00:24:34,370 That horrible mountain man. 198 00:25:23,560 --> 00:25:27,040 Speak. Touch my nipples. 199 00:27:02,380 --> 00:27:07,220 I never imagined Miss Pottsworth to be so, so beautiful. 200 00:27:07,580 --> 00:27:14,020 Yes, but more than that, she seems so worldly and so wise. 201 00:27:14,800 --> 00:27:18,300 I get the strangest sensation just being near her. 202 00:27:19,120 --> 00:27:20,940 Something I've never felt before. 203 00:27:21,920 --> 00:27:24,700 Yes. We should go visit her soon. 204 00:27:27,520 --> 00:27:28,520 Why wait? 205 00:27:28,620 --> 00:27:30,020 There's no time like the present. 206 00:27:32,320 --> 00:27:34,340 Miss Pottsworth, we didn't see you there. 207 00:27:34,780 --> 00:27:35,800 Oh, call me Helena. 208 00:27:36,200 --> 00:27:38,100 So what should I call you two besides delicious? 209 00:27:39,360 --> 00:27:43,700 I'm Lucy, and this is... This is... Amy. 210 00:27:44,800 --> 00:27:48,180 So, you two hope to learn the wisdom that's been passed down to me, huh? 211 00:27:49,220 --> 00:27:50,220 Well, get undressed. 212 00:27:51,740 --> 00:27:53,480 Undressed? Yes, get undressed. 213 00:27:54,260 --> 00:27:58,320 You can't possibly hope to learn the possibilities of the universe if you 214 00:27:58,320 --> 00:27:59,320 even know your own body. 215 00:33:20,650 --> 00:33:23,910 You know, I don't know what, but there's something about that woman. 216 00:33:24,210 --> 00:33:26,730 I think she's going to spell trouble for this town. 217 00:33:27,490 --> 00:33:30,190 I'd ride her out of here on a railroad track, but we haven't built a railroad. 218 00:33:30,310 --> 00:33:33,090 But even if we still had a railroad, I have to be careful. 219 00:33:33,390 --> 00:33:34,970 She did save Diane's life. 220 00:33:35,510 --> 00:33:36,890 I have to think of the voters. 221 00:33:46,550 --> 00:33:49,610 Oh, look, boys, a local street merchant selling his wares. 222 00:33:51,150 --> 00:33:52,730 Does my art please you, sir? 223 00:33:53,670 --> 00:33:55,990 You can have it for a fair price. 224 00:33:57,410 --> 00:33:58,750 That's not art. It's shit. 225 00:33:59,210 --> 00:34:02,830 Yes, sir. I made it myself. I saved a ton on paint. 226 00:34:03,070 --> 00:34:05,890 I call it feces in repose. 227 00:34:06,110 --> 00:34:09,690 You're a horrible, disgusting little man. That's the most disgusting thing 228 00:34:09,690 --> 00:34:11,630 seen all day. Bubba, get over here. 229 00:34:12,110 --> 00:34:15,130 Give this man a good flogging. Oh, he sure is pretty. 230 00:34:15,630 --> 00:34:17,590 Clog up his pores so he can't inflict it. 231 00:34:24,080 --> 00:34:25,840 Why don't you bring it along? We'll give it to the mother -in -law at the 232 00:34:25,840 --> 00:34:26,840 Christmas gift. 233 00:34:44,040 --> 00:34:45,440 Good afternoon, Mayor. 234 00:34:46,760 --> 00:34:48,900 Yes, ma 'am. Good afternoon, Mayor Rudolph. 235 00:34:49,120 --> 00:34:51,360 Hello, how are you this fine and lovely day, Miss Chase? 236 00:34:52,219 --> 00:34:53,400 I'm doing very well. 237 00:34:53,790 --> 00:34:57,110 Especially considering the money you raised to help the Bakersfield 238 00:34:57,350 --> 00:35:01,210 Ah, yes, the Bakersfield Schoolhouse. Well, I was going to take that money and 239 00:35:01,210 --> 00:35:04,290 build myself a great big mansion, but it was the school issue that helped put me 240 00:35:04,290 --> 00:35:05,290 over the top in the election. 241 00:35:06,030 --> 00:35:09,430 God knows I hate this godforsaken little town, and the children of Bakersfield 242 00:35:09,430 --> 00:35:11,990 are going to grow up to be nothing but dirt farmers and baby -making machines. 243 00:35:12,170 --> 00:35:15,410 But I think if the rest of the country can see that I bring this crappy little 244 00:35:15,410 --> 00:35:18,630 town into prosperity, it'll bring me that much closer to my bid for the 245 00:35:18,630 --> 00:35:19,630 presidency. 246 00:35:20,670 --> 00:35:23,550 Oh, I mean, education is very important to me, my dear. 247 00:35:24,530 --> 00:35:25,530 Oh, yes. 248 00:35:25,830 --> 00:35:27,830 Well, thank you again. 249 00:35:28,150 --> 00:35:29,049 Oh, my pleasure. 250 00:35:29,050 --> 00:35:29,968 Have a nice day. 251 00:35:29,970 --> 00:35:32,330 Okay. What a great girl. 252 00:35:32,630 --> 00:35:34,310 A woman of such great moral fiber. 253 00:35:34,970 --> 00:35:37,590 Let's go see if we can find an amendment to wipe our asses with. 254 00:35:38,890 --> 00:35:39,890 No. 255 00:35:45,850 --> 00:35:47,410 My chicken's hungry, boy. 256 00:35:49,190 --> 00:35:50,630 I say my chicken's hungry. 257 00:35:52,970 --> 00:35:56,370 Now you pick, boy. All to read. 258 00:35:57,690 --> 00:35:59,430 I won't play this game no more. 259 00:36:01,190 --> 00:36:02,990 Oh, you's gonna play, boy. 260 00:36:03,590 --> 00:36:07,390 Unless you want the whole town to know you spared of a chicken. 261 00:36:18,700 --> 00:36:19,678 Oh, boy. 262 00:36:19,680 --> 00:36:23,460 It just ain't your day, is it? You ready, Mr. 263 00:36:23,680 --> 00:36:24,800 Chicken? You ready? 264 00:36:31,860 --> 00:36:34,060 Goddamn chicken, goddamn chicken. 265 00:36:35,600 --> 00:36:38,500 Mr. Chicken like that, he's surely dead. 266 00:36:38,760 --> 00:36:39,760 Goddamn chicken. 267 00:37:01,379 --> 00:37:02,379 Hey boys. 268 00:37:05,020 --> 00:37:06,560 We've got a game for you to play. 269 00:38:03,100 --> 00:38:06,880 Helena's sexual healing had rekindled the passion I had once felt for my 270 00:38:06,880 --> 00:38:07,880 husband. 271 00:38:07,960 --> 00:38:12,060 But, once again, his work came before his husbandly duties. 272 00:38:17,540 --> 00:38:18,760 Why, hello, my sweetness. 273 00:38:19,140 --> 00:38:23,940 Guess what I'm working on. A law that will tax people for breathing, picking 274 00:38:23,940 --> 00:38:26,460 their nose, or picking at their dingleberries. 275 00:38:26,800 --> 00:38:28,080 A freaking genius. 276 00:38:30,760 --> 00:38:33,140 You've been working so hard. 277 00:38:33,800 --> 00:38:36,520 Yes, I have. I'm thinking of brand new ways to talk to people. 278 00:38:37,740 --> 00:38:41,280 Is there anything I can do for you? 279 00:38:42,540 --> 00:38:44,480 Please stop that. You're wrinkling the threads. 280 00:38:45,000 --> 00:38:46,700 I just had this cleaned, my dear. 281 00:38:47,420 --> 00:38:52,620 Anything. No matter how sick, twisted, or painful. 282 00:38:53,640 --> 00:38:57,340 Please, my dear. Yes, there is something that you can do for me. I'm having my 283 00:38:57,340 --> 00:39:00,180 pretty pony shoes down at the blacksmith with solid gold shoes. 284 00:39:00,680 --> 00:39:03,540 Right this very minute, my pretty pony. I love her. She's so cute. You can go 285 00:39:03,540 --> 00:39:04,540 fetch her for me. 286 00:39:04,700 --> 00:39:07,340 Wash my poo -poo undies and get my pretty pony for me. 287 00:39:07,720 --> 00:39:09,080 Go before I attack you. 288 00:39:10,080 --> 00:39:11,080 Very busy. 289 00:39:15,180 --> 00:39:16,180 Dingleberry. 290 00:39:17,000 --> 00:39:18,000 Fucking genius. 291 00:39:20,680 --> 00:39:21,860 Oh, hi, Carol. 292 00:39:22,360 --> 00:39:25,480 Diane, what a pleasant surprise. It's been so long. 293 00:39:25,760 --> 00:39:28,640 Oh, I know. I should have stopped by sooner. I wish you had. 294 00:39:29,720 --> 00:39:30,720 I can imagine. 295 00:39:31,460 --> 00:39:34,180 Definitely. I was here actually to pick up Rudy's new pony. 296 00:39:34,480 --> 00:39:37,920 Oh, what a shame. You just missed him. He'll be back in a few hours if you'd 297 00:39:37,920 --> 00:39:38,920 like to come back. 298 00:39:39,180 --> 00:39:42,340 No, actually, why don't I just wait? Why don't you? 299 00:39:44,600 --> 00:39:48,940 You know, you are quite an attractive woman. 300 00:39:50,840 --> 00:39:52,980 Why, thank you. It's mutual. 301 00:39:53,820 --> 00:39:59,220 Well, thank you. I mean, you're really attractive. 302 00:41:54,350 --> 00:41:55,890 3, 2, 1 303 00:43:53,960 --> 00:43:58,180 It seemed that Helena's influence was spreading through the town like 304 00:43:58,900 --> 00:44:02,600 But there still remained a few who were immune to her influence. 305 00:44:05,280 --> 00:44:12,100 What's happening in this town? I don't know, but people have been 306 00:44:12,100 --> 00:44:18,080 coming to my office for the last two days complaining of strange fever. It 307 00:44:18,080 --> 00:44:21,900 started when that Miss Pottsworth woman came to town. You're right. Now, think 308 00:44:21,900 --> 00:44:22,920 you're not to poke my hat. 309 00:44:24,560 --> 00:44:25,720 We should just juggle up. 310 00:44:27,760 --> 00:44:31,360 Oh, I mean, we shouldn't jump to conclusions. We should just let the 311 00:44:31,360 --> 00:44:32,360 its good. 312 00:44:37,620 --> 00:44:38,620 Good morning. 313 00:44:39,680 --> 00:44:45,420 Today's sermon is about the temptation of the flesh and the sins that we must 314 00:44:45,420 --> 00:44:46,420 not succumb to. 315 00:44:47,540 --> 00:44:51,040 Now, if you will all open your Bibles to page 459. 316 00:44:51,340 --> 00:44:52,340 Oh, Rabbi! 317 00:44:54,869 --> 00:44:55,869 Fucking coming. 318 00:44:56,030 --> 00:44:57,730 Oh, crap. I've got to make this quick. 319 00:44:58,570 --> 00:44:59,570 Okay. 320 00:45:00,990 --> 00:45:01,990 Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. 321 00:45:02,250 --> 00:45:03,310 Fornication. Unless you're married. 322 00:45:03,590 --> 00:45:04,590 Forget about it. 323 00:45:05,350 --> 00:45:06,350 Masturbation. Don't do it. 324 00:45:06,970 --> 00:45:07,968 Blah, blah, blah, blah. 325 00:45:07,970 --> 00:45:08,968 Bestiality. 326 00:45:08,970 --> 00:45:10,330 No way. 327 00:45:11,220 --> 00:45:15,480 God will smite and forget the homosexuality. He who entereth man 328 00:45:15,480 --> 00:45:16,480 the kingdom of heaven. 329 00:45:16,980 --> 00:45:17,980 Beg forgiveness. 330 00:45:18,700 --> 00:45:19,820 Fire and brimstone. 331 00:45:20,980 --> 00:45:23,320 Pecking at your testicles for all of eternity. 332 00:45:24,340 --> 00:45:25,580 The donation tray. 333 00:45:26,300 --> 00:45:27,480 Thank you, thank you, thank you. 334 00:45:28,240 --> 00:45:29,240 God bless. 335 00:45:30,020 --> 00:45:31,020 Divine plan. 336 00:45:31,820 --> 00:45:35,900 Blessed are we who... Let us pray. 337 00:45:44,460 --> 00:45:47,380 Oh, Reverend, tell me about Satan again. 338 00:45:47,600 --> 00:45:48,720 Oh, yeah, Satan, he's bad. 339 00:45:48,920 --> 00:45:51,160 He's really, really bad. How bad? That's how bad I can look. 340 00:45:51,360 --> 00:45:55,880 Oh! Yeah, I'm a bit mediocre, but bad is something else. Oh, he's got horns? 341 00:45:56,000 --> 00:45:57,120 He's got horns. How big are they? 342 00:45:57,400 --> 00:46:00,700 And they jab you. He's talking about his trident now. Oh, yeah, more than that. 343 00:46:00,720 --> 00:46:04,120 Are you kidding? His tail. His tail is even long. Oh, boy. And here he comes 344 00:46:04,120 --> 00:46:08,980 here. Because it's one of these things. Oh, Jesus, Mary, and Joseph. Oh, my God. 345 00:46:09,040 --> 00:46:11,000 Amen. Can I hear an amen? 346 00:46:56,110 --> 00:46:57,170 Maybe the mayor was right. 347 00:46:58,430 --> 00:47:00,330 Maybe this town's just a waste. 348 00:47:06,090 --> 00:47:09,470 Oh, Diane, you startled me. 349 00:47:09,830 --> 00:47:11,190 What have you been here so late? 350 00:47:11,810 --> 00:47:13,630 I've been watching you, Miss Chase. 351 00:47:14,470 --> 00:47:18,210 I must say, you are quite an attractive woman. 352 00:47:19,210 --> 00:47:24,890 I know that you're a wonderful teacher, but are you a good student as well? 353 00:47:26,220 --> 00:47:27,220 What do you mean, Diane? 354 00:47:27,300 --> 00:47:28,380 Are you feeling well? 355 00:47:29,040 --> 00:47:30,040 Oh, very. 356 00:47:31,220 --> 00:47:33,220 She's never felt better, in fact. 357 00:47:33,720 --> 00:47:37,800 Miss Pottsworth, what are you doing here? We're here to teach you. What is 358 00:47:37,800 --> 00:47:38,800 meaning of this? 359 00:47:39,160 --> 00:47:41,000 Why are you both looking at me like that? 360 00:47:41,580 --> 00:47:43,780 We're here to teach you, dear. Don't be scared. 361 00:47:44,340 --> 00:47:45,340 Teach me what? 362 00:47:46,040 --> 00:47:47,040 Art? 363 00:47:49,400 --> 00:47:50,400 No. 364 00:47:53,300 --> 00:47:54,400 Don't, Miss Pottsworth. Come on. 365 00:47:57,480 --> 00:48:00,280 Oh, yeah. 366 00:48:31,120 --> 00:48:33,240 Thank you. 367 00:49:35,680 --> 00:49:38,340 Thank you. 368 00:52:14,000 --> 00:52:15,700 I cannot describe what I had become. 369 00:52:16,340 --> 00:52:21,200 Helena Pottsworth had released a beast buried deep inside me, and I had found 370 00:52:21,200 --> 00:52:24,160 and freed that same beast in the other women of Bacchusville. 371 00:52:24,840 --> 00:52:27,640 But the women were not the only ones harboring beasts. 372 00:52:43,080 --> 00:52:44,460 The entire town is in shambles. 373 00:52:44,880 --> 00:52:48,340 They seem to have become the heck of zombies. 374 00:52:48,860 --> 00:52:53,240 It seems that only we three have not succumbed to this... this... Erotic 375 00:52:53,540 --> 00:52:54,540 Yes! 376 00:54:39,020 --> 00:54:40,100 You should all be ashamed of yourself. 377 00:54:41,200 --> 00:54:42,940 No, Mayor, you should be ashamed. 378 00:54:43,340 --> 00:54:47,180 You ignore your own wife and make these people feel like sex is a bad thing, 379 00:54:47,380 --> 00:54:49,820 when it's the most beautiful thing in the world. 380 00:55:34,030 --> 00:55:35,750 ever seen Diana act that way before? 381 00:55:35,970 --> 00:55:38,050 Yes, every night. Isn't it absolutely annoying? 382 00:55:40,090 --> 00:55:45,070 I can't keep this place forever. The act of such is very taxing on the human 383 00:55:45,070 --> 00:55:47,130 body. No, it's absolutely disgusting. 384 00:55:48,850 --> 00:55:53,310 She hates that they exhaust themselves and then grab that pot -wood woman and 385 00:55:53,310 --> 00:55:55,110 then force a cure out of her. 386 00:55:55,410 --> 00:55:59,550 Yes. That new kidnapping technique I've heard so much of. You're brilliant, 387 00:55:59,630 --> 00:56:00,630 Doctor. 388 00:56:58,280 --> 00:56:59,460 Is my pony ready yet? 389 00:57:00,000 --> 00:57:02,080 It's quieted down out there. Let's go. 390 00:57:02,460 --> 00:57:03,460 Oh, okay. 391 00:57:03,960 --> 00:57:06,320 No, no, no, no. This way, this way. Oh, okay. 392 00:57:06,840 --> 00:57:09,520 Why is my zipper open? 393 00:57:09,740 --> 00:57:10,900 You don't have to, Tim. 394 00:57:58,960 --> 00:58:01,260 I love the smell of burning witch in the morning. 395 00:58:02,580 --> 00:58:03,840 Big bird, no. 396 00:58:04,820 --> 00:58:06,100 What's the matter, town folks? 397 00:58:06,620 --> 00:58:08,940 Too tired to help your precious erotic witch? 398 00:58:09,300 --> 00:58:11,440 That's right, I said it. She's a witch. 399 00:58:12,740 --> 00:58:16,780 She bedeviled this entire community with her black magic. And the price to pay 400 00:58:16,780 --> 00:58:17,780 her to buy the... 401 00:58:30,570 --> 00:58:31,750 Brenda, bitch, what the fuck do I care? 402 00:58:32,090 --> 00:58:33,430 Right! Doctor! 403 00:58:35,510 --> 00:58:38,110 Damn it, Jim, I'm a doctor, not an arsonist! 404 00:58:39,410 --> 00:58:40,410 No! 405 00:58:47,930 --> 00:58:51,410 You are an ignorant man, Mayor Rudolph, but you are correct. 406 00:58:52,870 --> 00:58:53,910 Bacchusville is your town. 407 00:58:55,090 --> 00:58:58,910 Therefore, I will leave this place, and I will take the pleasure of the flesh 408 00:58:58,910 --> 00:58:59,910 with me. 409 00:59:00,880 --> 00:59:03,060 No mortal eye shall ever gaze upon me. 410 00:59:03,740 --> 00:59:07,940 But those who are brave enough to venture into the woods will feel my 411 00:59:07,940 --> 00:59:10,000 know the pleasure that is mine to bestow. 412 00:59:22,200 --> 00:59:23,700 That's right, girly. 413 00:59:25,500 --> 00:59:30,060 And now that the town is mine once again, I'm going to work harder than 414 00:59:30,060 --> 00:59:33,760 learning... Where the fuck are you going? Hey, doc, where are you going? 415 00:59:33,760 --> 00:59:34,880 jerks, get over here now. 416 00:59:35,260 --> 00:59:37,740 This is my time. Go, go, go. I don't need you all. 417 01:04:06,700 --> 01:04:07,700 Bye. 418 01:06:39,560 --> 01:06:40,560 Chicken again tonight. 419 01:07:29,230 --> 01:07:30,230 Are you here? 420 01:09:55,620 --> 01:09:56,620 Fuck me.